Several days ago I went to the mall with my mom, using the time in between Axl's naps, hoping to get back before it was time to lie down again, because often the transfer from car to bed just spoils the entire thing. So I ended up getting stuck in a Macy's line forever because the lady just couldn't figure out how to use the gift card I had along with a discount I should have been receiving, Axl whining, crying, and fighting to get out of the stroller the entire time...so I missed the precious window.
I tried my best to keep him awake on the way home, which worked for a total of about 5 minutes, but after that all I heard in the car was the raspy breath coming from his stuffed nose from crying for the previous 15 minutes. When we got home, he inevitably woke when I got him out of the car seat. I would normally just lie him straight in the bed to try and keep him asleep, but he had a dirty diaper. So I fought with his tired, fussy self for the next couple of minutes getting a fresh diaper on and lying him in the bed, pants-less, to save time and hopefully aide in his comfort for the probably-already-shot nap. I tucked him in tight and handed him his bear.
I left the room and listened to him talking/whining for several minutes and then heard the blessed silence, deciding quickly to take a nap of my own. Five or ten minutes later, however, Tyler came up the steps, returning from work. We talked for a while and he walked over to work on the computer which is right outside the nursery, so I told him to be sure and be quiet so as not to wake him up--it was a fluke anyway that he fell back asleep, so I wasn't about to mess it up.
About 20-30 minutes had passed at this point and I heard some interesting noises coming from the monitor. Not talking, not whining, not Axl noises of any sort so I had just decided it was some interference from the monitor of some kind. When Tyler left the room, though, I decided to just go in a check to make sure everything was ok.
One door to Axl's room is squeaky and the other is not. So I made my away around the long way to open the silent door and walk only as far as necessary to peer over the crib bumper to peek in--this is a very practiced routine. The first thing poking up, however, was a bare bum. Yes, Axl's naked butt just bubbling up over the bumper. My first thought was simply frustration that he wasn't asleep, then a little chuckle. As I walked closer, though, the smell was a sure sign that I was not going to be happy with the picture appearing before my eyes. I decided to stop right there and turn around to get Tyler, half to show him the funny sight of our son's little derrière and half because I knew I didn't want to tackle a diaper-less child who had obviously-by the smell in the room-pooped, alone.
We entered again together to find something I had never really imagined. As we got closer to the bed we found Axl lying there face down. There was poop EVERYWHERE. He had taken the poop and pulled it apart, leaving little pieces from one side of the bed to the other. He had smeared the poop all over the sheet. His pacifier was encrusted with the poop. And lastly, and worstly, he had been EATING the poop. His smiling, yes smiling, face looked up at us smeared with spit and poop from forehead to chin.
Tyler went into "fixing" mode fast, "You take the bed, I'm getting him" and scooped him up by the hands and feet taking him to the bathtub-so I didn't get a picture of the little scoundrel. Though while psyching myself up to tackle the mess I did think to capture this moment for us to remember--Don't look if you're squeamish.
I learned several lessons today
1. Silence does not always mean sleep
2. Never lie Axl down without pants on
3. Thank goodness for husbands (I later told Tyler that if he weren't there I probably would have turned back around and locked the door. Just kidding, but really, that would have been a little overwhelming)
*also I did call the doctor to make sure he would be ok. She said "Well, he will probably throw up, because if I ate my poop I would probably throw up, but he will be ok" :)
7 comments:
i can soooo relate to your story------L has been pooping during sleep time and we go in there she'll have put her hands in her diaper (i guess cause she thinks it's fun) and then she'll smear it on her head (maybe she thinks it's shampoo or hair gel or something!!!) it is soooooo disgusting. her hair will smell for days even though we wash it a million times, even put a little bleach in the tub and baking soda. ugh. drives me crazy. the only way to prevent it is to put a onesie (which she's a bit old for!) and a pair of pants on her--needless to say, it's been happening a lot lately.... i hope axl doesn't do this when he's 2 too! oh, and sometimes when she poops randomly during the day, she'll have scooped some onto her hands and bring it over to me. nice.
It's easy to laugh when it isn't happening to you! But...laugh out loud I did! Ask Tara about her "poop" story when she was about Axl's age. White walls, white crib, white large snoopy dog, white white white everything, along with a braided rug...until she undid her diaper and discovered something "new" which she smeared and smeared. Funny story to tell LATER, but not at the time. I yelled for Don, he cleaned up her room, crib, walls, etc. while I put her in the tub! Even though she will be 29 this year, I STILL remember! :)
Oh man, that is funny! I did the same thing when I was little. Apparently I was eating it, too. :) My mom loves to tell the story, too.
ohhhh the picture...lovely...
Yes, it has happened even to the best of us and I have to tell you that Rick is the best poop cleaner in teh world. I will jsut close with a freindly "beware of grapes" if you want details I can fill you in:)
Wow...what a funny story. I wish you could've gotten a shot of Axl. I can just imagine you finding that and wondering what the hec to do next. Miss you guys...give ax a love for us
BaHAHAHAHAHAHA! Fantastic! Well, on this one Axl has beat McKay, hands down.
Ah the joys of being a mother!
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